I've Just Seen A Face

I tried to get out of the room before the rest of them because I really didn’t feel like talking or even looking at Paul. Even though I rode with them to the hospital, I decided to take a taxi home. I wasn’t walking fast enough because I could hear them yelling after me.
“Hey, Speedy Gonzales, slow down a little will ya?” John yelled. I turned around. Paul was giving a look that said, “I need to talk to you“, but I refused to even slow down.
“Sorry, but I want to catch a cab,” I said turning back around.
“You want a cab?” Ringo asked, “What’s wrong with us?” I turned around again still walking.
“Nothing, I just need to be by myself for a little. That’s all,”
“Hey, is everything alright?” John asked, as they made their way to me.
“Yes, I just want to take a cab tonight,” I said. Paul walked up to the other side of me.
“I’ll go with you in the cab,” he said.
“Thanks Paul, but I kinda just want to be alone,” I said not looking at him.
“I know, but I really think someone should come with you. It’s really late, and I don’t like the thought of you going home by cab all alone,” he said.
“Yeah, let our Paulie take you home,” John said. I figured there was no way out of this, so I stopped fighting.
“Okay,” I said giving up. We walked outside and it had gotten really chilly. Plus it was misting, which didn’t help at all. Suddenly I felt something going around my shoulders and looked up in Paul’s direction. He just looked at me with those sad eyes as he put his coat and arm around me.
“See you in a bit Paul,” John said.
“Yeah,” Paul nodded back. Paul and I watched as John and Ringo got into their car and drove away. I started to take off Paul’s coat.
“Olivia,” Paul said not letting me.
“Paul, did you not get the hint? I don’t want to be with you right now,” I said. He looked up at the sky as if he was asking God to help him.
“Yes, I figured that, but I need to explain what happened,” he said looking back down at me.
“No you don’t. I get it.” I said starting to walk away.
“Obviously you don’t,” he said grabbing me softly but firmly, and pulled me back.
“What's there not to get? You were being selfish, wanting that girl. There's nothing else to it,“ As he kept hold of me with his right hand, he raised his left to catch a cab, not responding to me but I didn't care. One was there within minutes and we got in. I looked the opposite direction the whole way to my house. Paul didn’t speak a word, but I could just feel his eyes looking at me. When we got there, he thanked the guy and gave him the money.
“Hey, I wasn’t going to say anything, but, aren’t you that Beatle Paul McCartney?” the cab driver asked. I looked back at Paul and the driver. Paul smiled slightly.
“Yes, that’s me.” He said.
“I hope I’m not bothering you too much, but my daughter is a huge fan. Could I-?” he asked holding out a napkin. Paul turned back to me.
“Please wait a minute luv,” he said as he turned and gave the cab driver his autograph. I just stood there annoyed. I don’t know why I was even waiting for him. I started walking away.
“Whoa, whoa!” Paul yelled.
“Thank you!” the cab driver yelled as Paul ran from the car towards me. He caught up to me again, but didn’t say anything until we got to my door.
“May I come in? We need to talk,” he said. Knowing he wasn’t going to leave me alone I agreed. I also was curious on what his ‘explanation’ of him hitting on that nurse was going to be.
“Fine,” I said opening my door. We walked in and I gave him his coat back and sat on my bed just staring and him. He sat down next to me. We just sat there, neither of us saying a word. I looked at him.
“Well?” I said, as he turned to look at me.
“Olivia,” he started, “I had to do it.” He said and I gave him a confused look.
“Oh really, you had too? Who made you?” I said sarcastically.
“No one, but Olivia, I can’t go around acting the way I really feel. You don’t know how difficult this is… I should have never said anything.” He said closing his eyes. I let my stubborn guard down and began to feel less mad at him. I never realized how hard this probably was for him. And I was doing the same thing to him with George without realizing it, because I was with George so it didn’t feel wrong, “Olivia, what are we doing?” Paul asked, looking at me, exhausted. I just looked back at him. I couldn’t answer his question because I didn‘t know myself and it kinda made me think, “The reason I flirt with other girls like that is because if I don’t, the guys will know that there is something up. And I’m not about to tell them that I have a thing for you.” He sighed, “I like you, Olivia. I’m not going to lie. Ya, I sleep around, but ever since I met you, I haven’t wanted to do that anymore. But there’s nothing I can do about my feelings, because you are with one of me best friends. So I guess in a way, I’m trying to get over you by being the way I was.” He let out a little laugh, “And let me tell you, it’s not working. Not one bit. As a matter of fact, the more I am with other girls, I’m not satisfied cuz I want you.” He looked at me again. I smiled slightly because I was flattered, “So I ask you again, what are we doing? Why do we keep flirting and kissing, but yet do nothing more about it?” he asked confused. I had to think for a moment because I often wondered the same thing. I looked back at him, looking at me with confusion and longing in his eyes.
“I don’t know,” I said softly, “I guess, it’s because I really like you, but I like George too. And I can’t bring myself to dump him…yet. I just got done ruining a very long relationship with Davy. And if I were to dump George now, it would’ve been pointless.” I said.
“But if you were to dump George, wouldn’t it be for me?” Paul asked, “so it wouldn’t be worthless, right?”
“Yes, that’s true. I just don’t know what’s going to happen between George and me right now...I have strong feelings for both of you," I said stopping but quickly continuing,"And you said it yourself, I better not hurt him.”
“I know I told you not to hurt him, and I meant it. But that was also before I felt this way about you. However, I still mean it as much as I did then, but if you aren’t with George for the right reasons, and it’s a one sided relationship, then you’re going to hurt him even more when you break it off. And I would rather you save him the extra pain and tell him the truth now.” He had a good point, “I don’t mind if you need to figure things out with him before doing anything drastic. That’s understandable. I’m not going anywhere and will wait for you for as long as it takes. But like I said, I don’t want him to get really hurt, so just be careful. “ He paused, “Heh, this is kinda funny if you think about it?” he said with another little laugh. I was confused.
“It is?”
“Yeah, but not about George, about me.”
“Paul, I don’t get it.” I said.
“Well, in this situation right now, I’m kinda feeling like a side thing. And I find myself wondering if that’s what I am, or if you really like me.” He said. I was still confused.
“Why is that funny?”
“Because it’s usually the birds that need to know that about me. I kinda just used them for sex, but didn’t really think about what some of them thought about it and what it meant to them. I guess I’ve never really known how they felt until now.” Finally I understand. Hm, maybe this will cure his sleeping around? Ah, bet not.
“I get it now. And, no you are not just a side thing. Paul I really, really like you. You know that, it’s obvious. I can‘t believe the others haven‘t noticed.” I said and Paul smiled slightly.
“So now what? Are we just going to continue doing what we are doing or stop?” he asked.
“First, can I ask you a question?” I asked him.
“Sure,”
“What’s going on between you and Brittany?” I figured I’d bring this up since we were having this deep conversation. He looked away from me and didn’t say anything. My heart sunk, and I nodded in understanding,
“You really like her don’t you?” I finally said. He looked back at me.
“Yes and no. Sometimes I look at her and really like her, but then other times I don’t. I guess it’s kinda like you with me.”
“Paul, there’s never been a time where I thought I didn’t like you.” I said.
“Really?,” he asked.
“Yes. So what about her then? What if I end up dumping George for you and you decide that I’m not really the one you wanted. What if it was Brittany?” I asked starting up a new problem.
“It won’t happen that way.” He said assured.
“How do you know?” I asked.
“Because, I’ve not liked her more than I have liked you. To be honest, a lot of the times I liked her, was really because she looked easy.” He said. My eyes grew big.
“You were just trying to get her into bed?!” I asked shocked.
“No…yes. I don’t know. Part of it was I thought I would make you jealous. You were off flirting with one of me good friends, and it drove me mad. Granted you are dating him, but still. I thought maybe if I would do it with one of your friends, you might get jealous too. I don’t know, it was dumb.” I smiled because he was rambling, “Point is, I don’t like her like that really, and you have nothing to worry about.” I presented him with another question.
“Is that how you feel about me too?” He looked at me with shock.
“Olivia, why would you ask that? I’m going behind me best friend’s back to try and get you,! Of course I don’t!”
“Okay. I just wanted to make sure.” I said smiling.
“We’re way off track here. Back to my original question.” He reminded me.
“What do you want to do?” I asked.
“Personally, I think things right now are fine. It’s not really hurting anything right now, except our emotions at times. But we get over it because if the situation. However, if we continue, we can’t be getting mad at each other.” He said, “And I’m not just aiming things at you. I’ve felt things plenty of times when I see you and George together. But we need to agree on that.”
“I agree,” I said.
“So are we good again?” he asked, “You’re not angry with me anymore?” I smiled at him.
“No, plus, I was more jealous than angry.” He smiled at that.
“Really?” he asked nudging me lightly. I nudged him back.
“Yes, really,”
“Well, I should probably get back before the other’s wonder what happened.” He said getting up. I got up with him.
“Yeah, what time is it anyway?” I asked.
“Around 2 am,” he replied.
“Wow,”
“Yeah. Well, I’m glad you listened to what I had to say, because I think we straightened a few things out,” he said.
“Yeah, I’m glad I did too.” I said walking him to the door. When we got there, Paul pulled me against him, and just looked at me.
“What?” I asked looking up at him. Gosh, he was tall.
“You are so gorgeous,” he said and kissed me on the forehead. I smiled, he was such a charmer.
“Thanks,” I said, and stood on my tiptoes to give him a quick kiss. As I pulled away, he brought me back to his lips for a longer, deeper kiss. As much as I didn’t want to, I pulled away.
“What?” he asked.
“You should probably get back, remember?”
“Oh yeah, crap. Thanks,” he said. I just laughed at him. He was so adorable.
“See you tomorrow I’m sure.” I said.
“You too,” he said as he began to leave. He turned around quickly.
“What are you doing?” I asked him.
“One more little one,” he said as he gave me a little kiss on the lips. I laughed.
“Bye Paul”
“Night Olivia,” he said and I shut the door. I couldn’t help but smile. I know you’re probably thinking what a slut or player or something along those lines. And if I were reading this, I would too. But really, you can’t say that until you’ve been in my shoes feeling all the emotions I am. And not just about one guy, but two. I’ve never felt this way for two guys before, and I figure the only way to figure which is the right one, is to just act normal and do what comes to me. And in this case, I'm having an open relationship with George and a secret semi relationship with Paul, that's the only way I know how to deal with my situation, whether it’s called cheating or not. Anyways, I got ready for bed and fell asleep peacefully for about the first time in a week or so. It was wonderful.

On to Chapter 17