Like always when Paul and I go on a trip, we spent the whole day packing.  The reason it took so long is because the both of us actually hated it so we’d do a little here and there, leaving the majority of it for the last few hours or less. 

            “Paul are you almost done?  It’s already 2:30,” I asked him as I made my way out of the bathroom.  I hung my shoulders as I saw him—instead of packing—sitting on the bed playing with Mary.  Normally you would have just assumed he was done packing, but I knew he wasn’t.  He looked over at me and smiled guiltily.

            “Sorry love, she just called out to me,” he said standing up and putting her back in her crib.  I smiled and shook my head.

            “I don’t know why you don’t like packing so much—you should be used to it by now.”

            “But that’s why I hate doing it—I’ve had to pack almost everyday for the last 12 years for tours and stuff,” he pointed out, “I’m almost done though love—we’ll make it on time,”  As much as I wanted to believe Paul, we didn’t end up getting to his dad’s until about 3:30pm.  I looked over at him as he pulled up to the house.  He laughed, “Yeah, yeah, we’re late,”

“I knew we would be,” I smiled.

“You know me all to well,” he smiled.  I laughed and got out of the car, shivering from the frigid air.  I opened the back door to get Mary while Paul continued to the trunk for the bags.

            “Paul?  Olivia?” I heard a voice.  I turned around and smiled.

            “Hi Aunt Jin,” I said with a smile.

            “You two are nearly an hour late—it’s already half past three,” she said coming up to us.

            “You can thank your nephew for that one,” I said looking at Paul.  He smiled and rolled his eyes, setting the bags down to greet Aunt Jin.

            “Sorry Jin,” he apologized, “Hope dinner’s still alright?”

            “Oh of course it is!” She laughed, “I figured you’d be late anyway—you’ve been this way since as long as I’ve known you,” she smiled, “ However I must say, I thought maybe this one would put you right,” she raised an eyebrow and eyed me.  I laughed.

            “Oh believe Aunt Jin,” I said picking Mary up from her car seat, “I’ve tried,”

            “He’s a hopeless cause,” she sighed, “Come ‘ead you two, inside—it’s freezing out here,” Paul and I followed Aunt Jin into the house—which smelled delicious.  Paul’s house to me always had that old family get together feeling and I loved it—especially during holidays.  Paul immediately made his way upstairs to put the bags in our room and I made my way out into the living room.  Jim looked up from his paper and smiled.

            “Well, if it isn’t my daughter-in-law and granddaughter,” he smiled that warm smile of his.  I smiled as well and walked over to him bending down to give him a hug as best I could with Mary in my arms.

            “How are you doing Jim?” I asked him.  He nodded.

            “Oh just fine, dear.  Yourself?”

            “Great, thanks,” I answered.  Jim held out his hands.

            “And how’s my grandbaby doing?” he then asked as I handed her off to him.  She cooed as Jim talked to her.

            “Better now,” I said looking around for Paul.  I didn’t see him so I just took a seat on the couch.

            “Hello Olivia dear,” Ruth said emerging from the kitchen.  I looked up with a smile.

            “Hi Ruth, how are you?”

            “Just wonderful, and you?”

            “Good,” She stood behind Jim and said a few little words to Mary and disappeared back into the kitchen.

            “So where’s my son gone off to?” Jim asked me.  I shrugged.

            “I have no idea actually,” I said looking around again, “I thought he just went up stairs to put our bags down….mind if I go see?”

            “Of course,” Jim nodded with a smile.  I wondered how he was doing health wise since last time we saw him.  There had been that incident when Paul and I were in Paris, around last Christmas if I remember correctly, where he had that attack ending up in the hospital.  Just by looking at him, he looked alright, but he normally got up to meet us at the door, where today he didn’t even try to move from his chair.  I made my way to the stairs and walked up to Paul and my usual bedroom.  The door was partially open and I touched it enough to open it all the way.  Paul, sitting on the bed and on the phone, quit talking immediately and looked at me.  I looked around curious.

            “What are you doing up here?” he asked hand covering the phone.  I raised an eyebrow.

            “This is our room is it not?” I asked him, “What are you doing?”

“Talking on the phone,” he said shortly. 

“To who?” I asked him.

“Do you need something?” he asked.  I scrunched my nose at his rudeness but brushed it off.

“Your dad is wondering where you are,” Paul nodded, and then smiled.

            “I’ll be down in a minute love,” he answered.  Though I wanted to press him more on the situation I figured I’d just let him be.  I just hoped he wasn’t doing his work here, when he was supposed to be getting away from that.  I closed the door again and headed back downstairs—Jin and Ruth now in the living room.

            “I was just going to come see if you needed help,” I said sitting beside Ruth.

            “Nope, it’s already done and just cooking,” Aunt Jin smiled, “It’ll be ready in about a half hour,” I nodded and heard Paul descending the stairs in the other room.  He emerged into the living room and smiled big.

            “Hello family,” he said hugging everyone then taking a seat in the chair kiddy corner from me, “Sorry bout that—had to make a quick phone call,”

            “Oh, is that so?  And to whom?” Aunt Jin asked.  Paul smiled.

            “Sorry Jin—it’s Christmas not long from now, I can’t say,” I suddenly realized why he had been so secretive and short a few minutes ago.  I wondered if it was for me or someone else.  I figured I’d try to get it out of him a bit later, “How’s everybody doing?”

            “Just fine, son,” Jim nodded, “Things with the Beatles going better?”

            “Ah,” Paul sighed, “I don’t know—think we could not talk about that while we’re here?  I mean, I want this to be totally Beatle-less,”

            “Of course,” Jim nodded, “Sorry lassie, but I’m going to have to give you up for a minute,” he said to Mary, then looking down at his watch.

            “I’ll take her,” Aunt Jin said quickly.  I smiled as Jim handed Mary off to Aunt Jin.  He scooted to the end of the chair and slowly began to get up.  I don’t think anyone knew what to say at the moment so we all just sat and watched as he struggled to get out of the chair—something that had never happened before as long as I’ve known him.  He made it about half way and suddenly collapsed back into the chair.  Ruth stood up immediately as did Paul and I.

            “Dad—you alright?” Paul asked walking over to him.  I sat back down and just watched in silence.  Jim laughed to himself.

            “Go sit down Paulie, I’m fine,” he said waving Paul off.  I glanced up at Paul’s concerned face as he decided to continue standing there.

            “Do you need help?  I don’t mind helping—“

            “I’m fine Paul,” Jim said rather firmly.  Ruth looked sympathetically over at Paul.

            “I’m sorry Paul, he doesn’t mean to be harsh,” she said glaring quickly at Jim, “He did something to his back again—remember a few years ago?” Ruth said.  Paul nodded, “He wants to do things on his own,”

            “I remember,” Paul said, “But you could’ve just said that dad—I was only trying to help you,”

            “I know I know, I’m sorry, I forgot you didn’t know,” Jim said making it to his feet.  He stood up slowly and glanced at Ruth.  Paul wasn’t watching, seating himself back into his chair.  Ruth and Jim disappeared down the hallway, and I was somewhat bothered by the recent event.  The three of us sat in silence for a few moments,

            “So where’s Uncle Harry?” Paul asked.  Aunt Jin looked up suddenly as if deep in thought from something else.  She smiled.

            “Oh he had to leave for a few days—business stuff,” she smiled, “He’ll be here long before Christmas though,”

“Good,” Paul smiled.

“Paul do you mind taking your daughter back for a few minutes, I need to tend to the food and I need your wife’s help,” Paul nodded and I knew something was up—things just didn’t seem right since the incident with Jim in the chair.

             “Of course I don’t mind,” Paul smiled getting up and taking Mary from Aunt Jin, “Come here,” he said to Mary.  Aunt Jin cocked her head in the direction of the kitchen and I followed her out.  When we got there she walked directly to the counter—her back facing me. 

            “Everything alright Jin?” I asked carefully.  She hung her head and turned around.

            “Jim’s not doing so well,” she said softly. 

            “What do you mean?  He seems alright except for his back—” I started, but stopped as she shook her head.

            “There’s nothing wrong with his back dear,” she said pulling out a chair from the table, “Well at least not directly.”

“I don’t know what you mean,”

 “Please sit down,”

            “Aunt Jin you are scaring me,” I began.  I was also wondering why I was in here talking about this and not Paul.

            “Oh it’s going to be alright, I’m sure, but, well—Jim hasn’t been well lately,”

            “Again, what do you mean?”

            “He’s not eating again, not sleeping very well, and he’s just gotten so weak!” she said, “I’ve never seen my brother like this before,”

            “Did he go to the doctor?” I asked and she nodded.

            “Yes, a couple weeks ago,”

            “A couple weeks ago!” I said rather loud.  Aunt Jin shushed me and I softened my voice, “You mean this has been going on for weeks?  Why didn’t anyone call and tell us—call and tell Paul!?”

            “Because we’ve been hearing about the things he has to deal with at work.  Please dear understand—the last thing he needs at a time like this is to know that his dad is sick,” she pleaded.  I understood where she was coming from, and it suddenly worried me that she wanted me to continue to keep it from Paul.

            “How sick?”

            “Well, he’s on medication—he takes a few things a couple times a day—it’s where he went just now.  The doctors aren’t 100% sure of the cause, but they are eyeing him pretty closely.  However they did state that it more then likely is one of those flues that we old people get and he’ll soon be better,” she said laughing quietly.  I just sat not knowing how to respond right away.

            “Let me guess,” I started, “You want me to keep this from Paul,” I said and Aunt Jin looked at me pleadingly.  I looked away and sighed.

            “Please dear, just for a while,”

            “And what if something happens while we are here?  What are you going to tell him?” I asked and she was silent, “I’ll keep it from him as long as I can, but I’m telling you now it won’t be easy—Paul and I tell each other everything,”

            “I know dear, I’m sorry I had to ask this of you,” she said touching my hand.  I smiled as best I could in a situation like this.  I was slightly angry but at the same time I understood.

            “You know if he finds out about this…” I shook my head, “He’s going to be furious that no one told him,” Aunt Jin sat once again, in silence, “And if something happens on top of it?  He won’t be able to cope I can bet that—you know him better than I do.  He blames himself for Mary…and then if this...”

            “I’ll deal with that if it happens,” Aunt Jin assured me softly caressing my hand, “But I’m sure everything is going to be fine,” I looked at her skeptically.

            “What’s going on in here?  Someone die?” We both turned to see Paul standing in the doorway.  I smiled and walked over to him—wondering how long he’d been standing there.

            “No, but its Christmas soon so I can’t tell you,” I said kissing him.  He laughed.

            “You always mock me,” I smiled again, “But I love you anyway,”

            “And I love you,” I said as he kissed me, “Where’s Mary?”

            “Oh dad’s got her again,” he laughed, “What are you women cooking in here?  It smells wonderful,” he moved from me and towards the stove.  He grinned, “Oh yes, me favorite,”

            “Of course dear,” Aunt Jin said.  Paul looked back to me and winked.  I shook my head and left the kitchen to join Jim and Ruth.  Paul followed me out and this time sat next to me on the couch—his arm around my waist. 

            “Olivia and I are making our own album,” Paul blurted out.  Jim looked up from Mary, the long McCartney eyebrows raised.

            “Oh really?  When do we get to hear that?” he asked.

            “We plan to release it sometime the beginning of next year,” Paul replied smiling.  He leaned in and kissed me on the cheek.

            “Hello?!  Anybody here!?”  I looked to Paul and Jim looked up again.

            “Is that your brother?” I asked.  Paul shrugged and stood up.

            “Don’t know—I didn’t think he was coming tonight, but let’s go see,” he said taking my hand as we left the living room.  I felt bad leaving Jim in there alone with Mary.  Sure enough Mike stood in the doorway, hugging Aunt Jin.  Paul laughed, “You twit what are you doing here?”

            “Glad to see you too brother,” Mike laughed hugging me, “Good to see you as always Olivia,”

            “You too Mike,” I smiled.  Mike gave Paul a punch on the shoulder.

            “Aye now, what’s that for?” Paul asked rubbing his arm.

            “For being a jerk when I haven’t seen you in weeks,” Mike said.  The two stared at each other for a moment then both laughed and gave each other a hug.

            “Oh you know it’s nice seeing you,” Paul said, “Though we seem to be missing some, yeah?”

            “Oh Angela and Peter?” Mike asked and Paul nodded (Aunt Jin had returned to the kitchen), “She’s at her mum’s--I’m not staying the night,”

            “Oh you’re not?” Paul asked his arm around me again.  Mike shook his head.

            “Nope, I just heard that you two were coming up tonight and so I thought I’d just stop by for dinner, you know, take advantage of ol’ Jin,”  he snickered as did Paul.

            “I heard that!” Aunt Jin called.  We all laughed.

            “She’s making roast, potatoes, and of course, cobbler for dessert,” Paul exclaimed and Mike smiled big.  I rolled my eyes.

            “Let’s go in the living room,” I suggested.  The boys nodded and we made our way once again to main space.  Jim was as thrilled to see Mike as he was to see Paul.

            “Well she’s bigger than last time I saw her,” Mike said taking Mary from Jim.  I had taken her to the doctor that day as planned and they gave me a little something to help ease her tummy problems and so far she was doing just fine.

            “Yeah, she’s almost a year you know,” Paul said pointing at her.  Mike raised his eyebrows.

            “That’s right, April correct?”

            “Yep,”

            “Has she said anything yet?” He asked and Paul laughed.

            “Babies don’t talk at 8 months do they?” he looked at me, “Do they?” he whispered.  I shook my head, “You should know that Mike, you have Peter,”

            “I know, but honestly, I don’t remember when he started talking,” he said and they laughed.

            “Well they don’t usually start talking that young, but she’s able to balance on her hands and knees,” I said to Mike.  Paul grinned.

            “Yeah, so she’ll be crawling soon,” he said then frowned, “Which means she’ll be all over the house—Martha probably constantly on her tail,”

            “Oh don’t worry Paul, you know Martha is one of the nicest dogs in the world—besides we know she loves Mary,” I said and Paul smiled again seeming reassured. 

            “So tell us more about this album?” Jim asked Paul.  Mike looked from his dad to his brother.

            “Album?  The new Beatles one?”

            “Oh now Mike, Paul doesn’t want us talking about the Beatles,” Jim said.

            “It’s alright dad, he didn’t know,” Paul said.  Mike looked concerned.

            “I suppose I should know, but,—things not going well?” Paul shook his head and looked down at his nails.

            “Not really—we fight a lot—not seeing things eye to eye musically,” he looked up at us, mostly at me for whatever reason, “Besides, we’re all into different things now—I’ve got a family, they’ve got families…”

            “Are you just hoping things are going to get better then?” Jim asked.  He was always very interested in Paul’s career choice.  As much as Paul told me when he was younger, his dad enforced the boys to go to school and get good careers, Jim couldn’t help his love of music, and deep down I think he was proud of Paul’s career path.  He may not have agreed with every aspect of it, but for the most part I think he was happy.  Mike on the other hand, didn’t really get the music gene.  He, like Paul, took piano lessons under the suggestion of his dad—but he ended up in Photography.  Paul laughed hesitantly.

            “I’m probably not supposed to say anything—well, I know I’m not, but—“

            “Paul are you sure?” I interrupted him knowing what was coming.  He looked at me for a brief moment as if taking a second thought.

            “What?  You’ve got to tell us now Paul,” Mike said.  Paul looked back at him.

            “Dinner’s ready!” Aunt Jin called from the kitchen.  Paul not finishing what he started got up from the couch me in tow.  Mike followed suit, passing us into the kitchen.  Paul and I stayed behind as Jim struggled again to get out of his chair.  He made it up with a bit more ease then before and just smiled big at us waiting.  Paul stared at him—the look of helplessness in his eyes.

            “What are you waiting for?  Dinner’s ready, didn’t you hear her?” Jim asked hurrying us along.  I smiled and led everyone back to the dining room.  Jim took the head on one end, and I was at the other, Mary in a high chair beside me.  Everyone sat down and Aunt Jin placed the roast on the table.

            “Wow, Jin, this looks great,” I said.  She smiled so proud of her cooking.  Everyone nodded in agreement and Paul stuck his fork out to grab a piece, Mike in close pursuit.  I laughed as Aunt Jin’s hand came down quickly and slapped his wrist.  He pulled back immediately and I could tell Mike was relieved he wasn’t as quick as his brother.

            “James Paul McCartney where are your manners?” she huffed and I side glanced at him, a smirk of course neatly planted on his face.  I looked over to Jim and he sighed shaking his head. 

“How old are you?” I whispered to Paul.  He laughed quietly and brought his face to my ear.

“Not as young as you,”

“Well you act younger,” I whispered back.  He laughed and squeezed my knee under the table making me jump.  Aunt Jin sat down and we said grace.  Jim served everyone up like normal and we ate the delicious meal before us.

            “So tell us that secret Paul,” Mike piped up. 

            “Secret?  What secret?” Aunt Jin—the gossip queen—asked.  Paul shook his head about to speak.

            “Dad asked Paul something about an album and then Paul said that the Beatles weren’t getting along.  Then he said that he shouldn’t tell us—and then just stopped,”

            “Oh now Paulie dear, you can’t do that!  It’s just not right,” Aunt Jin stated.

            “If he can’t tell us, let him be,” Jim said smiling. 

            “Nah, I’ll tell ya,” he looked over at me, “They’re family,”

            “I suppose it’s up to you,” I stated giving Mary a little plate of mashed potatoes.  She wasn’t eating solids yet but she loved squishing her fingers in it.  One night she got a hold of Paul’s at the dinner table and since then Paul always fixes a special little dish for her to play with.

            “Well, for starters, Mike, the album dad was talking about wasn’t a Beatles album,” Mike looked surprised.

            “Are you going solo?! Is that the secret!?”

            “Would you settle?  I’m trying to tell you,” Paul said, “That’s not really the secret—it’s, well, kind of—we’re breaking up after this album, so probably this year,” he said and Aunt Jin’s fork dropped and everyone at the table was silent.  Paul looked around aware of the reaction he obviously caused—all eyes on him.

            “You’re breaking up the Beatles?” Jim asked very much surprised—and I could imagine why.  This had been his son’s whole life for the last 12 years and all of a sudden it was over. 

            “Well, I’m not breaking us up personally—we all agreed, you know.  It’s for the best,” Everyone remained quiet, the only one making noises was Mary with her mashed potatoes.  Paul laughed a bit, “Oh come ‘ead you guys, it’s not like it’s the end of the world you know,” he said taking a bite of beef.

            “But Paul this is what you love—I can’t see you not doing music,” Ruth said, Mike nodding beside her.  Paul nodded.

            “Oh I know, and I agree.  But in all honestly, I’ve found something that I love so much more than music,” he said.

            “What’s that?” Mike asked.  Everyone turned to look at him because the answer was obvious, “What?”

            “Olivia, you twit,” Paul said.  Mike turned red as he realized his not-so-bright moment, “I’m not giving music up anyway—the album is one Olivia and I are making together,” A few eyebrows perked up and suddenly I felt very awkward.  Me—just plain old Olivia—making an album with their Paul McCartney?  I wondered what they were thinking.

            “Oh really?”  Ruth asked nodding, “That sounds nice,”

            “Oh it is!” Paul said happily, “It’s going great—I love working with her,” he said and I smiled awkwardly. 

            “I think it’s a wonderful idea,” Jim stated, “What kind of music are you doing then?  Anything in particular?”  Paul shrugged and looked at me.

            “Not really—it’s basically our normal styles,”

            “I bet there’s going to be a bit more ballads though,” Mike laughed, “John won’t be there to stop the ballad king anymore,” Paul frowned.

            “Shut up Mike,” Paul snapped and Mike continued to laugh.

            “You’ve been quiet Olivia,” Aunt Jin said and I looked up from my plate.  Paul seemed to look at me as if he had just noticed.  I smiled.

            “Have I?” I asked though it was a stupid question.  Of course I was or else she wouldn’t have said, ‘Olivia you’ve been quiet’.

            “Yes you have,” she laughed, “Are you enjoying the album?”

            “Yes of course,” I smiled then looked at Paul, “Though I’m not doing much—all the talent is right here,” I laughed as did everyone else.  Paul continued to stare with a frown.

            “When are you going to stop that?” he asked me softly.  I looked at him and everyone got quiet.

            “Stop what?” I asked.

            “Stop saying that shit,” he said.

            “James McCartney,” Jim said firmly.  Paul looked over at him and back at me.  I was taken aback by his attitude.

            “I’m sorry, but she always says she’s no good, you don’t understand,” he said and I finally understood why he was upset.  He must not have gotten that I was kidding.  He looked back at me, “You do.  I think you’re great, your fans think you’re great,—if I didn’t I would keep telling you that you are.  I think you’re one of the best female singers I’ve ever heard,” he said and I just continued to look at him as the rest of the family watched our current little drama play.

            “I’m sorry Paul, I was only joking,” I said feeling awkward yet again.

            “You may have been, but I know deep down you meant it.  We bloody wrote songs after your style because we though you were so great—I really wish you would realize that.  I mean, honestly, when you keep saying that I’m so talented and you aren’t, it makes me feel like sh—” he glanced back at his dad, “crap, you know?  I feel like I’m making you feel bad and there’s nothing I can do about it.  It makes me feel bad to be who I am, because I don’t want you to feel this way,”

            “Oh Paul, don’t feel like that!” I said upset that I made him think that way.  He shrugged.

            “Well,”

            “I’m sorry I say that so much—I do think I’m good,” I said and he glanced sideways at me raising an eyebrow in disbelief, “No I really do, it’s just—”

            “I think you are a wonderful singer myself,” Jim perked up.  Mike nodded,

“Angela,” he laughed, “She’s a huge fan, have I ever told you that?”

“What?” I asked turning my attention from Paul to Mike. 

“Yeah, I don’t think she wants me to tell you, but when I told her that you and Paul were dating, she wanted me to ask Paul when “we” could meet you and if she’d be able to get an autograph,” I was astounded.  I looked at Paul who was wearing his ‘I told you so’ face.

“Are you joking?” I asked.

“Olivia!” Paul said loudly.

“No, I’m not asking that because it’s hard to believe because it’s me—I’m just surprised that if she was such a big fan why she’s never said anything or asked me personally for an autograph.  I mean Paul and I have been together for a long time now,” I said and Mike laughed.

“That’s what I try to tell her, and she’s too embarrassed to ask you.  She’s afraid you’ll find her stupid or something,” Mike rolled his eyes, “That weird thing you women feel.  I told her that you wouldn’t mind, and she said that I’m supposed to ask Paul to secretly get an autograph from you sometime or she’s going to wait till Peter’s older and just say it’s for him,”  everyone around the table laughed.

“Angela is so funny,” Aunt Jin said with a grin.

“Yeah she is,” I nodded with a smile, “Can I tell her you told me?”

“Not unless you want me sleeping on the couch for the next week or so,” Mike replied and we all laughed again.  Aunt Jin and Ruth stood up ready to clear the table and I stood up as well.

“One of you sit back down, I’ll help out,” I said.  Aunt Jin offered the rest to Ruth and before following her in the kitchen with plates I bent down to Paul.

“I love you,” I whispered to him.  He smiled and cupped my face in his hands bringing me in for a kiss.

“I love you too.  I just wish you would have more self-confidence in yourself,” he said kissing me again.

“I’m trying,” I said softly and he smiled.

“I know.  It’s just horrible for me, because I can’t see or understand why you can’t see how stunning and great you are,” he laughed, “If you could only see what I see then everything would be alright,” I smiled and kissed him again.

“I thought you were going to help Jin—not make out with Paul,” Mike said.  I stood up fully and so did Paul.  Staring at Mike he began walking around the table towards him.  Mike realized Paul was coming after him and he quickly jumped from his seat, Paul quickening his speed as he did so.  Mike disappeared into the living room, Paul hot on his tail shouting ‘stupid git’, or something along those lines.  I rolled my eyes and Jim, yes again, sighed.  He looked up at me and laughed.

“It’s like those two never stop,” he said and I laughed, “I feel like they’ve been 10 years old for the last 15 years,”  I laughed again and agreed before leaving to go into the living room where Paul sat on the couch, Mike in a head lock.  They both looked at me when I entered.  I placed my hands on my hips.

“If you two men would kindly stop this for a second,” I began.

“What do you need love?” Paul asked breathing heavily.

“Just wondering if you would look after your daughter while I help your aunt,” I said and Paul smiled letting go of Mike.  Mike, with a brotherly love smile, shoved Paul as he got up and sat away from him.

“Of course I’ll watch her,” he said standing up and walking over to me.  He bent down to kiss me and I pulled away.  He frowned, “What?”

“You’re gross right now,” I said scrunching my nose.  He smiled evilly.

“Ah it’s only sweat.  Besides, I know of a certain activity in which you don’t mind me like this,” he said and I shook my head, “And I’m much sweatier then,” Mike snickered in the back and I wondered if every guy was like a ‘John and Paul’.

“Mary has mashed potatoes all over her face, clothes, and hands,” I said completely ignoring Paul’s comment.  He laughed and turned to Mike pointing at me.

“I bloody love this woman right here,” he said then turned back to me.

“So while you clean yourself off, if you could clean her too that would be fantastic,” I said and Paul smiled.

“You are such a good wife and mum,” he said pulling me to him.

“I try,” I said then continued, “She has some extra clothes up in the suitcase, that you might have to change her into,” I began to leave as Paul pulled me back and laid his lips on mine.  He was sweaty and gross but I honestly could care less.  He smiled as did I.

“Should I just put her in her nighty then?” he asked then looked at his watch, “It’s almost 6,”

“Yeah why don’t you,” I said.  He nodded and kissed me again.

“Sounds good,” he said and he followed me into the dining room, though I continued on to the kitchen to finally help Aunt Jin.  We spent the rest of the evening just talking and catching up on everybody’s life.  Mike left around 10ish and after that everybody went off to bed.  Mary was in bed long before that and was sleeping soundly when Paul and I crept into our room. 

“That was a fun night,” I said, “It was nice that you’re brother stopped by,” I said getting my pjs out of the suitcase.  Paul laid his “tour pants” as he called them, since he didn’t wear pjs at home with me, out on the floor beside the bed for the morning and stripped down.

“Yeah, I thought it was a nice surprise,” he said getting under the covers, “Though he was a right bugger tonight—very immature,”

“So were you honey,” I laughed slipping my nighty over my head. I turned towards Paul grinning on the bed.

“I like that one,” he said smiling.  I laughed as I walked towards my side of the bed.

“I should hope so—you are the one that bought it,” I said and he smiled big.

“I know,” he said as I snuggled up next to him under the covers, “I’m surprised you brought it here—after all I think it’s your most revealing,”

“Again, of course it is—you bought it,” I said and he laughed, “But it’s actually really nice for sleeping because it’s so revealing—it’s very light weight and comfortable,”

“And not bad for the eyes either,” Paul said, “Especially with your body in it,”

“I’m taking that as a compliment,” I said and he laughed.

“I should hope so, I don’t know what else it would be,” I laughed.

“Hey, who were you talking to earlier?” I asked looking up at him.

“When?”

“Right when we got here, when I came upstairs to tell you your dad was wondering where you were,” Paul nodded remembering.

“Oh right,” he smiled, “I already told you, I can’t say,” I moved a little so I could see him better.

“Sure you can,” I said and he shook his head.

“Just because you are wearing the most revealing lingerie piece there is, doesn’t mean I’m going to tell you—it doesn’t work all the time you know.  I can control me self,” he said and I laughed.

“I’m not going to get into how much that statement isn’t true,” I said and he frowned with the slightest hint of a smile—if that makes sense, “That’s not why I’m asking.  I was seriously curious and then I thought maybe it was something for a family member that I didn’t know about so I wanted to get in on the secret,”

“Well it is for a family member, you’re right there,”

“Who?  Ruth?  Aunt Jin?” I asked excited he was going to share with me.  He laughed.

“Don’t get so excited,” he said and I frowned, “It’s for me wife actually,” I groaned in disappointment and Paul laughed again.

“What?” I whined.

“Don’t look so down—you know you’re getting at least one present.  That should make you happy,”

“It does, but I still want to know,” I said and he laughed.

“I’ve said it before love and I’ll say it again—you are one crazy bird,” he said and I laughed, “I don’t know what it is about you that me fall in love with you so badly,”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked, “That there was some weird force that caused you to love me?  Otherwise you’d be repulsed?” he laughed.

“No that’s not what I meant at all,” he kissed me, “I just meant, back in that day you—well, I’m not going to say,”

“You keep doing that tonight!” I said curious and he laughed, “First off, this whole thing reminds me of that secret place you were going to take me when we got out of the room—and may I remind you I still don’t know what it is,” 

“That’s right,” he laughed again, “I forgot about that,”

“Then tell me!”

“I can’t,”

“Okay, I see how you didn’t want to tell me back then because you were going to take me after we got out—but sweetheart it’s been 5 years, and you still haven’t taken me let alone told me!”

“That’s because I wanted it to be the right time and things just got really busy when we got out.  And now that you reminded me, I still want to do it, so you’ll just have to wait,”

“You drive me crazy,”

“I know I do,” he laughed, “But you drive me crazy too you know”

“I know,” I smiled and kissed him, “Now what were you going to say?”

“When?”

“Paul,” I whined.

“I’m sorry,” he giggled, “I don’t want you to take it the wrong way,”

“Well now I have a whole bunch of things going around in my head so you better just tell me,” I said and he sighed.

“What I was going to say, is back in those days, you were the type of girl that I took advantage of,”

“What exactly do you mean?” I asked.

“Well,” he cringed, “In was weird in the beginning because as I got to know you I started falling in love with you, but at the same time I didn’t know what was going on because you were the type that I used.  You know, the sexy, ditsy, weird, naïve kind, and—”
            “You think I’m ditsy?!” I said surprised and he laughed.

“Uh, do you want me to answer that?” he said and I sat up, “Ah come back down here, I love your blondeness.” I pouted.

“I can’t believe you think I’m ditsy, and naïve.”

“Actually I don’t really, well, at times you are, but I think all girls are that way—you’re just cuter than others in your blonde moments,”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” I asked and he smiled kissing me.

“I thought so, but I guess not,” he said, “Look, I love you more than anything and will for the rest of my life—you know that,” I nodded, “I’m just saying I always thought I wanted like a posh girl, you know like Jane, someone who wasn’t really weird or different—someone who was upper class that matched my status if you will,”

“You’re talking with your ego right now, and I think you may be insulting me too,” I said and he shook his head strongly.

“No I’m not!  I promise, just let me finish,” he said, “That’s what I thought I wanted.  The girls like you I always thought were good just for sex, because they were so naïve, but I never really got to know those ones and then I saw you and I swear it—I fell in love with you on the spot.  I never believed in love at first sight, but girl, you changed me mind,” he said and I smiled.

“Alright keep talking,” I said and he laughed.

“So….when I actually got to know you and I got to know your cute little quirks I, surprising me self, began falling hard for you.  Jane may have been at my level, but she wasn’t weird or different—in all honesty, she was a bit boring—she was like everyone else.  It was you, I realized that was way above me, and it was you that I wanted and needed; it was you that made me realize how great life can be.  And it made me remember how much I myself, though hard to believe, have my own little quirks,” I laughed.

“Yes darling you do, and it’s not hard to believe,” I said and he laughed.

“Aye, now,” he smiled, “But really, you made me feel like I could be myself.  I didn’t feel like I had to be the ‘normal man’ if you will.  I could just be who I was, and it just happened to go perfect with they way you are.  And that’s all I meant to say earlier.  Is that I don’t know if it was one particular thing that convinced me that I was wrong all the years before and that made me fall so badly in love with you, or if it was just a sudden realization the happen to happen when I met you,” I nodded.

“Now that you explained yourself, it’s not that bad,” I said kissing him as he nodded, “Though I still can’t believe you think I’m ditsy,” I said and he laughed again.

“I already told you I think it’s adorable—you always make me smile and I’m so thankful that you chose me,”

“No, I’m thankful you chose me,” I said and he smiled kissing my forehead.

“Can I ask you a question now?” he asked suddenly.

“Sure,”

“What were you and Aunt Jin talking about in the kitchen earlier?” he asked and my heart froze.  I had forgotten all about that.

“I already said I can’t tell you,” I said and Paul smiled shaking his head.

“No I let it go then because Jin was there, but I heard a lot of raised voices.  I also heard my name and me dads,” he said and I was silent, “Is there something that you want to tell me?”

“We were talking about you and your dad’s Christmas presents,” I said trying desperately to cover it up.  Paul, once again smiled.

“Love, you forget I can read you like a book,” I looked away, “I can read it in you eyes, and it only confirms it when you look away like that,”

“I’m not supposed to tell you,” I said hoping he’d leave it at that.  His smile faded a bit.

“Why?  What’s going on?”  I moved my head into his chest and just laid in silence.  I felt him rest his head on the top of mine as he stroked my back gently, “Please tell me love,”

“It’s not as bad as it’s sounding right now,” I said still face in his chest.

“Then will you help me to stop worrying by just telling me?” I finally looked up at him and he looked at me with pleading eyes.

“I guess your dad isn’t doing so well again,” I said and he looked confused.

“You mean his back?” he smiled, “This has happened before love he just—”

“That was a cover,” I said and he frowned.

“A cover?  For what?”

“He’s not eating well, not sleeping well, and Jin said he’s pretty weak—that’s why he couldn’t get out of the chair when he left to go get his pills,”

“Pills?  My dad’s never had to take pills,”

“Well, the doctor’s put him on something—Jin didn’t go into it.  This has been going on for a couple weeks I guess and…”

“A couple weeks!?” Paul asked upset, “Why didn’t they ring us?”

“That’s what I asked, and they didn’t want to put this on you with the difficulties of the Beatles.   Besides, Jin said that the doctors are assuming it’s just the flu that elderly folks get sometimes, and that’ll he be fine in a couple weeks,”

“Elderly?  Me dad’s not elderly,” Paul said.

“He’s 67 Paul,”

“Oh yeah, you’re right,” Paul laughed a bit, “It’s funny, you never really think of your parents as elderly,”

“I bet,” I said. 

“How old are your parents?” Paul asked.  I had to think about it.

“Well my mom had Phil when she was 18, and he’s 30…”

“She’s only 48!” Paul exclaimed, “She’s so young compared to me dad…hell, you’re so young,”

“What?  I’m 24,” I said and Paul laughed.

“And I’m 27.  I’m almost thirty and you aren’t even half way there yet—you’re like a baby,”

“Leave me alone,” I whined hiding my face in his chest, “We have a baby; I am not the baby,” Paul laughed.

“Ah, love, you’ll always be my baby,” he said raising my chin so he could kiss me.  I smiled.

“So you aren’t mad or worried?” I asked.  He shrugged.

“I knew that he had the same problems last Christmas, so I’m assuming the doctors are right.  He’s getting older so he’s getting sick faster in the winters.  At least I know—that’s the main thing—you know because if something happened and I wasn’t aware of his stage right now…”

“I know, that’s exactly what I said to Jin,” I told him and he nodded.

“Thanks for telling me love,” I shrugged.

“I warned her that we tell each other everything and that I’d try to do it as long as I could,” Paul laughed.

“You didn’t make it very long,” I giggled.

“I didn’t think I would,” Paul turned slightly and turned off the side light.  He wrapped his arms around me again bringing me to him.  He kissed my forehead in the dark.

“I love you Olivia,”

“I love you too,” I replied snuggling close and smiling.  We fell asleep and the days few days were more or less a repeat of today.  One day we spent the whole day, all five of us, decorating the house with Christmas ornaments that Jim had packed down in the basement.  It snowed lightly that day making it all the more perfect.  Jin, Ruth, and I made cookies after cookies, bars after bars, getting everything ready for Christmas.  Harry joined us a few days later along with Angela, Mike, and little Peter.  As much as it pained Mike, I took Angela to the side and gave her a signed autograph.  She was embarrassed for feeling embarrassed and we mostly just laughed about it.  She talked about her favorite tracks of ours and that she was crushed when we were no longer together but perked up when her brother-in-law turned out to be the reason we split up, meaning she’d be family.  Sooner than later it was Christmas, my favorite time of year, and I was excited to see what it was Paul had gotten me over the phone.